Babes in the woods

Pep, I need more information about this picture of your family tree. If hand-drawn, it'd fall in 4906 (PLANS AND DRAWINGS FOR ARCHITECTURAL, ENGINEERING, INDUSTRIAL, COMMERCIAL, TOPOGRAPHICAL OR SIMILAR PURPOSES, BEING ORIGINALS DRAWN BY HAND; HAND-WRITTEN TEXTS; PHOTOGRAPHIC REPRODUCTIONS ON SENSITISED PAPER AND CARBON COPIES OF THE FOREGOING); if otherwise printed, it'd fall in 4911 (OTHER PRINTED MATTER, INCLUDING PRINTED PICTURES AND PHOTOGRAPHS). But in either case, if it's over 100 years old, it'd go in 9706 (ANTIQUES OF AN AGE EXCEEDING ONE HUNDRED YEARS).


Today's earrings: pines, leaves

Bedtime reading: Devil-May-Care, Elizabeth Peters

Now I'm having trouble seeing the forest

To answer my esteemed commentariat:

• If an oak tree fell in the forest, and in doing so crossed an international border into the customs territory of a country which uses the World Customs Organization's Harmonized System, it would fall under subheading 4403 (WOOD IN THE ROUGH, WHETHER OR NOT STRIPPED OF BARK OR SAPWOOD, OR ROUGHLY SQUARED).
• If a wooden shoe tree fell in the forest under the aforementioned conditions, it would fall under subheading 4421 (OTHER ARTICLES OF WOOD).
• If a live lemon tree, suitable for planting, fell in the forest under the aforementioned conditions, it would fall under subheading 0602 (OTHER LIVE PLANTS (INCLUDING THEIR ROOTS), CUTTINGS AND SLIPS; MUSHROOM SPAWN).
• If poultry fell in the forest under the aforementioned conditions, it would fall under either 0105 (LIVE POULTRY, THAT IS TO SAY, FOWLS OF THE SPECIES GALLUS DOMESTICUS, DUCKS, GEESE, TURKEYS AND GUINEA FOWLS) or 0207 (MEAT, AND EDIBLE OFFAL, OF THE POULTRY OF HEADING 0105, FRESH, CHILLED OR FROZEN), or possibly 9705 (COLLECTIONS AND COLLECTORS' PIECES OF ZOOLOGICAL, BOTANICAL, MINERALOGICAL, ANATOMICAL, HISTORICAL, ARCHAEOLOGICAL, PALAEONTOLOGICAL, ETHNOGRAPHIC OR NUMISMATIC INTEREST).
  
• If a decision tree inscribed on a CD fell in the forest under the aforementioned conditions, it would fall under subheading 8523 (DISCS, TAPES, SOLID-STATE NON-VOLATILE STORAGE DEVICES, "SMART CARDS" AND OTHER MEDIA FOR THE RECORDING OF SOUND OR OF OTHER PHENOMENA, WHETHER OR NOT RECORDED, INCLUDING MATRICES AND MASTERS FOR THE PRODUCTION OF DISCS, BUT EXCLUDING PRODUCTS OF CHAPTER 37).
• If a Lego tree fell in the forest under the aforementioned conditions, it would fall under subheading 9503 (TRICYCLES, SCOOTERS, PEDAL CARS AND SIMILAR WHEELED TOYS; DOLLS' CARRIAGES; DOLLS; OTHER TOYS; REDUCED-SIZE ("SCALE") MODELS AND SIMILAR RECREATIONAL MODELS, WORKING OR NOT; PUZZLES OF ALL KINDS)
• If the Stanford Tree fell in the forest under the aforementioned conditions, it would fall under the jurisdiction of the local immigration authority.

I don't really know why the Malaysian government is so interested in the subject. But how I know is that their chapter on wood is about 3000 lines long. (For comparison, the US chapter is about 500 lines, and the India chapter is about 200 lines.) Malaysia specifies 93 different kinds of wood by name under each size and grade of timber. It's obsessive. It's almost as bad as Pakistan on car parts or Argentina on beef.


Today's earrings: diamonds, dice

Bedtime reading: Devil-May-Care, Elizabeth Peters